20 posts in category Tender Lions

Scroll for Blog Posts about Building the Vital Relationship Between Father and Son

Restraint – Has It Eluded Us?

Police violence, false social media outrage, wealthy parents buying their kids way into elite colleges, out of control spending, and the ugliness of our polarized political system. These are just a few examples where restraint seems to have eluded us as a society this last week. Oh, and we can’t forget Joe Biden. In 2017 the once rich and powerful Harvey Weinstein was accused of numerous accounts of sexual criminal behavior. The disgraced mogul has been voted out of the Academy of Motion ...

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Prepare the Child for the Road, Not the Other Way Around

I’ve still been thinking about the recent news story of the parents who allegedly tried to buy their kids way into elite colleges. If we want our sons to develop into tender lions then we have to be willing to let them experience real “heavy lifting”, whether it’s physical, emotional, mental or relational challenges. And that includes letting them feel the impact when they may make poor decisions. Jeff and I frequently see well-intentioned parents make nearly every important ...

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Do You Have O.C.P.

"One of the hardest things we must do sometimes is to be present to another person's pain without trying to fix it, to simply stand respectfully at the edge of that person's mystery and misery.” - Parker Palmer All across America today there are after-school and weekend programs that are full of parents who are afflicted with O.C.P. This is what Jeff and I call the Overly Competitive Parent Syndrome. Many parents find it nearly impossible to let their kids experience any kind of hardship ...

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A Fabricated Identity – Mission Impossible

The news this last week was filled with stories that exemplify the worst of the “modern identity” unchecked. Dozens of parents paid to help their undeserving kids get into prestigious universities. This appears to be the largest college admissions scam ever prosecuted by the Department of Justice. By “modern identity” I mean that a person has fabricated their identity from within…from their inner desires. This person then says, “I’ve decided who I am going to be and what I ...

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Failure is Awesome!

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” Winston Churchill I’ve had the great joy of watching my (just turned one) granddaughter go through many developmental stages in the last six months. Her parents encouraged her to roll over, then a few months later to rock on all-fours, and then crawl. Now we’re at the standing up stage, and we’re just a few weeks away from that magical first step. One thing that won’t hear when she takes ...

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Fatherlessness and its Negative Effects on Boys

For those who are new to our blog, my son Jeff and I just published Tender Lions – Building the Vital Relationship Between Father and Son. As we researched about the impact of fatherlessness on boys, we were pleased to find that young fathers today are actually spending more time with their sons than the dads of a generation ago. But that seems to be where the good news ends. According to the National Center for Fathering, more than 20 million children live in a home without the physical ...

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Raising A Boy Is Too Important To Leave To Chance

Your son is watching you — no matter if you're 25, 55 or 85. He’s watching. This presents an awesome opportunity to continue to influence your son with the time you have left, because your son is watching how you live your life. When I stand before God on that last day, he’s only going to ask me about me, not my neighbor, not my brother or anyone else. Even though Jeff is an adult with his own life, job and relationships, the type of influence I have on him is certainly different ...

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Time Matters

If you’re a new reader of our blog, Tender Lions is about building the vital relationship between a father and son. On March 1 my son, Jeff and I released a brand-new book, Tender Lions. The book, among other things, contains interviews with very interesting men that Jeff and I believe have valuable perspectives on their relationship with their dads. Jeff conducted the following interview with his life-long friend, Kris Grahnke, just a few weeks before Kris died of ALS on July 24, 2017. Kris ...

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My Son Jeff…the Tender Lion

I mentioned in the last blog that my son, Jeff and I have just finished writing a book about the importance of the father-son relationship. Very few of my colleagues have ever met Jeff since he’s lived in Phoenix for the last five year and I live in the Chicago area. I describe Jeff to my friends like this, “He is optimistic, empathetic, and filled with hope and humor. He’s also tough, competitive, passionate and fierce. He’s a young man of faith with a huge heart, and has character ...

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Brian Becker Has a Secret

For those who are regular readers of my Leaders Edge blog you may have (or not) noticed that I've only posted two blogs in the last six months. That's because my son, Jeff and I have been working on a very important project that is near and dear to our hearts. For the last two years we've been researching and writing about the importance of the father-son relationship. Here’s the secret…on March 1 we will be releasing our brand-new book about how to build the vital relationship ...

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